Entry #14 - Untitled- 5.17.07

Last night we got word that a good buddy of ours had a heart attack and is in a coma. He only left a few short weeks ago. He has a wife and 2 little kids. After the hardship of his incarceration and his accompanying absence from his family, I can’t imagine how difficult this subsequent crisis must be for them. My heart goes out to them.

This place has a way of beating perspective into you. Many of us have endured some of the most malignant torments that life has to offer. That said, it often takes a crisis to occur during our bids for us to practice some gratitude. I think that you can attribute this to many potential factors—one being simply that we are finally sober enough to realize the weight of a given situation. Another may be that humility may have finally penetrated our thick heads enough to allow a shred of enlightenment. When I think about our friend and his family I can’t help but count my blessings.

This whole thing evokes so many issues. Existentialism and faith. This can lead into the topic of religion in prison, which is a whole can of worms that I’ll save for its own entry. There’s the nature of death, which I find myself thinking about incessantly—likely the result of living with men of many varying generations and a surplus of idle time.

Our friend worked out hard every day and lost the equivalent of a small person while in here. It’s not an uncommon thing in here, as with so much time many invest it in getting into shape. I have to wonder if the readjusting to a less healthy lifestyle was a factor in his episode. Also, with the stress that I’m sure that one encounters when returning to civilization (which incidentally may be a cause as well), I have to ask if we aren’t ill-equipped and ultimately failed by “corrections”.

The most potentially tumultuous issue that this nurtures, however, is the ramifications of the prison system upon the family. In spite of misconceptions, an individual’s status as a parent or caretaker seems to have no bearing on the length and severity of imposed sentences. The status quo belief seems to be that such is inconsequential and that the guilty should pay just the same. This may be valid but the collateral damage is grave.

Having a parent incarcerated can really fuck a kid up. A lack of guidance and the resulting animosity can manifest in violently rebellious behavior and general deviance, creating the next generation of criminals which taxpayers ultimately must foot the bill for. Maybe that was the plan all along.

Prison destroys marriages, estranges siblings and often robs the elderly of their caregivers. “So what?” some may say – “It’s their own fault.”. True, but this view is simplistic and makes it evident that those who condemn felons for selfishness understand the interconnectedness of society about as well as the average criminal.

These camp level facilities—which house offenders who pose no flight risk or precarious threats to society—are a waste of government funds. These offenders could be out making a living, paying fines, restitution and taxes, and parenting their offspring, all with an ankle bracelet that they pay for out of their own money, instead of being a drain on society.

Even though I have no children and thus would not benefit, I’d still be in favor of legislation that would grant relief to committed parents. It just seems to make sense. But this is the B.O.P (Backwards On Purpose), so I suppose I should stop looking for logic. All my best to his family.